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搞笑的在这里

本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛English is used internationally. Here are some signs and notices written in English that were discovered throughout the world. You have to give the writers an 'E' for Effort.

***In a Tokyo Hotel:
Is forbidden to steal hotel towels please. If you are not a person to do such thing is please not to read notis.

***In a Bucharest hotel lobby:
The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.

***In a Leipzig elevator:
Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up.

***In a Belgrade hotel elevator:
To move the cabin, push button for wishing floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national order.

***In a Paris hotel elevator:
Please leave your values at the front desk.

***In a hotel in Athens:
Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 A.M. daily.

***In a Yugoslavian hotel:
The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid.

***In a Japanese hotel:
You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.

***In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery:
You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists, and writers are buried daily except Thursday.
***Similarly, from the Soviet Weekly:
There will be a Moscow Exhibition of Arts by 15,000 Soviet Republic painters and sculptors. These were executed over the past two years.

***In an Austrian hotel catering to skiers:
Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the boots of ascension.

***On the menu of a Swiss restaurant:
Our wines leave you nothing to hope for.

***On the menu of a Polish hotel:
Salad a firm's own make; limpid red beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger; roasted duck let loose; beef rashers beaten up in the country people's fashion.

*** Outside a Hong Kong tailor shop:
Ladies may have a fit upstairs.

***In a Bangkok dry cleaner's:
Drop your trousers here for best results.

***Outside a Paris dress shop:
Dresses for street walking.

***In a Rhodes tailor shop:
Order your summers suit. Because is big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation.

*** A sign posted in Germany's Black forest:
It is strictly forbidden on our black forest camping site that people of different sex, for instance, men and women, live together in one tent unless they are married with each other for that purpose.

***In a Zurich hotel:
Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose.

***In an advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist:
Teeth extracted by the latest Methodists.

***In a Rome laundry:
Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time.

***In a Czechoslovakian tourist agency:
Take one of our horse-driven city tours - we guarantee no miscarriages.

***Advertisement for donkey rides in Thailand:
Would you like to ride on your own ass?

***In a Swiss mountain inn:
Special today -- no ice cream.

***In a Bangkok temple:
It is forbidden to enter a woman even a foreigner if dressed as a man.

***In a Tokyo bar:
Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts.

***In a Copenhagen airline ticket office:
We take your bags and send them in all directions.

*** On the door of a Moscow hotel room:
If this is your first visit to the USSR, you are welcome to it.

***In a Norwegian cocktail lounge:
Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar.

*** In a Budapest zoo:
Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty.

***In the office of a Roman doctor:
Specialist in women and other diseases.

***In an Acapulco hotel:
The manager has personally passed all the water served here.

***In a Tokyo shop:
Our nylons cost more than common, but you'll find they are best in the long run.

***From a Japanese information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner:
Cooles and Heates: If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself.

***From a brochure of a car rental firm in Tokyo:
When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor.
***Two signs from a Majorcan shop entrance:
- English well talking.
- Here speeching American.更多精彩文章及讨论,请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net
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Replies, comments and Discussions:

  • 工作学习 / English / 世界各地超搞笑的蹩脚英语大搜罗(zt)
    本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛英语现在已经成为一种通用的语言,但是很多国家地区,小到各个单位都有用错的时候,通常是公共场所(比如旅馆)张贴的告示。,内容果然很搞笑,现从中挑选了十句比较短的蹩脚英语,拿过来请您瞧一瞧,主要目的是:看看这些蹩脚英语的语法错误,究竟出在哪里,以便我们今后在使用英语时,能够避免同样的毛病。下面就是这十句蹩脚英语。

      ①If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself.

      日本旅馆:如果您想调节您房间的温度,请控制您自己。

      ②Please don't feed the animals. If you have any food, please give it to the guard on duty.

      匈牙利动物园:请不要给动物喂食。如果您有食品,请喂给值班警卫。

      ③Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar.

      挪威酒吧:女士们不要在酒吧里生孩子。

      ④Fur coats made for ladies from their skins.

      瑞典皮货商店:为女士们制作的皮大衣,是用她们的皮制成的。

      ⑤Teeth extracted by the latest Methodists.

      香港牙科诊所:由最新的卫理公会教徒给您拔牙。

      ⑥Drop your trousers here for best results.

      泰国的干洗店:在这里脱掉您的裤子,等待最好的结果。

      ⑦Specialist in women and other diseases.

      意大利妇科诊所:我们是women和其它疾病的专家。

      ⑧Welcome to the cemetery where famous Russian artists are buried daily except Thursday.

      俄国公墓:欢迎访问这个公墓,许多著名的俄国艺术家每天埋在这里,但星期四不埋。

      ⑨We take your bags and send them in all directions.

      丹麦机场:我们将拿走您的行李,送往四面八方。

      ⑩The manager has personally passed all water served here.

      墨西哥旅馆:旅馆经理将亲自为您撒尿。更多精彩文章及讨论,请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net
    • .
    • 不搞笑,一点也不搞笑。。。
      而且还太老。。。浆糊最近很怀旧的说

      不过这倒是纯英语的笑话,如果是英语母语的人看了会笑得直不起腰来。。。如果只看那个中文翻译就根本不是笑话了
    • 就烦你们显摆英语
      ZT : 宝玉在生意场上了混了一年,强烈感觉书读的不够,于是去北大进修,临行和黛玉道别。
      宝玉:“我现在深感知识不够用,我得去充电,妈的,终身学习的时代真的来了”
      黛玉:“去吧,记住,少上点网,还有,最好英语能过六级,拿个学位以后会有用的。”
      宝玉:“汗,你知道我外语从来没有及格过,我他妈最烦外语了,我就不明白了,咱们中国人怎么啦?好端端的咱在自己的国家,为啥要学外语那个劳什子呢?咱们很多人国语学的还不周全呢”!
      黛玉:“别乱琢磨了,这叫与时俱进,懂不?”
      宝玉:“老子坚决不学外语,我还就不信了,咱不学外语就真的成不了豺?”
    • 搞笑的在这里
      本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛English is used internationally. Here are some signs and notices written in English that were discovered throughout the world. You have to give the writers an 'E' for Effort.

      ***In a Tokyo Hotel:
      Is forbidden to steal hotel towels please. If you are not a person to do such thing is please not to read notis.

      ***In a Bucharest hotel lobby:
      The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.

      ***In a Leipzig elevator:
      Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up.

      ***In a Belgrade hotel elevator:
      To move the cabin, push button for wishing floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national order.

      ***In a Paris hotel elevator:
      Please leave your values at the front desk.

      ***In a hotel in Athens:
      Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 A.M. daily.

      ***In a Yugoslavian hotel:
      The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid.

      ***In a Japanese hotel:
      You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.

      ***In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery:
      You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists, and writers are buried daily except Thursday.
      ***Similarly, from the Soviet Weekly:
      There will be a Moscow Exhibition of Arts by 15,000 Soviet Republic painters and sculptors. These were executed over the past two years.

      ***In an Austrian hotel catering to skiers:
      Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the boots of ascension.

      ***On the menu of a Swiss restaurant:
      Our wines leave you nothing to hope for.

      ***On the menu of a Polish hotel:
      Salad a firm's own make; limpid red beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger; roasted duck let loose; beef rashers beaten up in the country people's fashion.

      *** Outside a Hong Kong tailor shop:
      Ladies may have a fit upstairs.

      ***In a Bangkok dry cleaner's:
      Drop your trousers here for best results.

      ***Outside a Paris dress shop:
      Dresses for street walking.

      ***In a Rhodes tailor shop:
      Order your summers suit. Because is big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation.

      *** A sign posted in Germany's Black forest:
      It is strictly forbidden on our black forest camping site that people of different sex, for instance, men and women, live together in one tent unless they are married with each other for that purpose.

      ***In a Zurich hotel:
      Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose.

      ***In an advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist:
      Teeth extracted by the latest Methodists.

      ***In a Rome laundry:
      Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time.

      ***In a Czechoslovakian tourist agency:
      Take one of our horse-driven city tours - we guarantee no miscarriages.

      ***Advertisement for donkey rides in Thailand:
      Would you like to ride on your own ass?

      ***In a Swiss mountain inn:
      Special today -- no ice cream.

      ***In a Bangkok temple:
      It is forbidden to enter a woman even a foreigner if dressed as a man.

      ***In a Tokyo bar:
      Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts.

      ***In a Copenhagen airline ticket office:
      We take your bags and send them in all directions.

      *** On the door of a Moscow hotel room:
      If this is your first visit to the USSR, you are welcome to it.

      ***In a Norwegian cocktail lounge:
      Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar.

      *** In a Budapest zoo:
      Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty.

      ***In the office of a Roman doctor:
      Specialist in women and other diseases.

      ***In an Acapulco hotel:
      The manager has personally passed all the water served here.

      ***In a Tokyo shop:
      Our nylons cost more than common, but you'll find they are best in the long run.

      ***From a Japanese information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner:
      Cooles and Heates: If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself.

      ***From a brochure of a car rental firm in Tokyo:
      When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor.
      ***Two signs from a Majorcan shop entrance:
      - English well talking.
      - Here speeching American.更多精彩文章及讨论,请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net